Lindsey Lohan Sentenced 90 Days

Boo fucking hoo.

This is what fux me up with everyone saying that she's getting mistreated because she's a celebrity;

1. She got a DUI and was caught with cocaína.
Real mofos would STILL be locked up behind some shit like that.

2. She lied about who, what, when, where, and why.
In the state of California, perjury is a fuckin' FELONY!
Mofos would STILL be up in jail if that went down.

3.She missed her crack-head classes because she "had to work".
Bitch!
#1. WHO you work for??? I'm just sayin'. Whose movie set you been on???
#2. You can't count going to clubs as work, because that ain't gon' fly with the judge. AND clubbing occurs at night. I know you need to sleep off the toxins during the day, but come on honey.
#3. A REGULAR muthafucka would have lost their job when they got that DUI. Mofos that are your age and in college would have lost their scholarships and grants. They woulda been fucked and hoping that SOMEONE in their family wasn't too disappointed with them to help them out with Pookie nem's tow-truck service so they can get paid under the table.

AND...
If you still had a job after the DUI, the judge would not have given a fux about your job. Do you WANT to go to jail, bitch???

And if you gave a fuck about your career and reputation, you wouldn't have been driving drunk and high with no draws on in the first fuxin' place.

4. Then her ass had to wear and ankle brace, like that was cute or something. And her shit went off because she was drinking at an after party.
Regular mofos would have been confined to their house and been on lock like Britney Spears. And if your probation officer KNEW you was going to parties, you woulda got chopped.

What really pisses me off, but doesn't because the girl is obviously sick, is that Lindsey didn't even try to pretend to clean up her act. It's like with teenagers. Tell your parents what they want to hear, then do what the fux you wanna do. But naw, Lindsey does her shit out in the open because she KNOWS she ain't going to jail.

Oh! Wait!
And what's this shit about when she went to Cannes and she lost her fuckin' passport????

Girl, bye!

What are you, fuckin' 2???
Suri Cruise has a purse and I bet she gots all her shits in it. What's your excuse???

If you can't take care of major shit like your fucking identification (in a post 911 world where if some shit went down, don't nobody care that you were in Mean Girls) then maybe you need to stay the fux at home.

See, Lindsey has shown everyone that she does not care. As long as the coke is poppin' and the drinks are of plenty, she's good.


Aw yeah. I just ran across the code for the video of her ass trying to get out of jail free.